Have you heard the phrase “time heals all wounds”, or “time heals everything”? Maybe at some point in your life someone has said that to you. That phrase has been tossed around as words of comfort when people are going through a heartbreak, loss, or hardship. People are told if they hang in there this too shall pass. We hear, go on with your life and whatever you are going through will be in the past and all things will be just fine. But what if it’s not that simple? What if time doesn’t heal all wounds? What if time doesn’t heal everything? Relying on time alone will only move us into the future with a load of unresolved hurt and issues.
One thing that I have observed and learned is that if you want to heal you will need to put some intentional focus and time into it. Let me put it another way, you will need to take responsibility for your part of the healing journey. Take it from me, I held on to unforgiveness for 20 years towards a family member and time did not heal but created other problems in my life. When hurt is not handled correctly it can morph into unforgiveness, anger, jealousy, pride, hate, loneliness, anxiety, fear etc. It can create a darkness in us and around us that consumes us and affects all areas of our lives. Even not knowing how to grieve properly from a loss we experience can have its consequences. These significant moments in our past can be very traumatic and need some attention that may require resources and help from others.
Can I tell you that asking for help is not a sign of weakness but a sign of wisdom. Allow others to speak into your life and be willing to heal in community. Healing can happen in many ways, but it starts with you.
Can I encourage you to consider a few things that will help you get started on your journey.
- Choose to want to heal. Choose to pursue the healing journey and not stay stuck.
- Acknowledge the hurt. Be honest about how you feel and express your emotions.
- Be willing to forgive others and yourself.
- Be grateful not only for where you are, but where you came from. Even in times of darkness and brokenness if you look hard enough you will find things to be thankful for.
- If you’re a spiritual person or a person of faith, allow God in to give you strength, rest, peace and to heal the broken parts.
Healing is possible and I have seen it in the lives of many, but don’t wander through time thinking it will just happen. With the right perspective, support, resources and time added to it, you will experience the healing you long for. Remember we are broken people and healing is not a destination, but a journey we embark on. As human beings there will always be opportunities to learn and grow as we continue to become the best version of ourselves. Have grace on yourself and know there is so much more for you. Be courageous as you step forward and heal from the past.
Grow as you go!
Walter Perez – Founder/CEO – The Leader Co. Inc.